Banquet for Life

So I went to the Crisis Pregnancy Center (CPC) Banquet for Life tonight. It was the third time I've been, with the first being while I was a volunteer counselor for one of their centers. The second time I went, I really didn't get too much out of the speakers, so while I appreciated the opportunity to contribute to their organization and see a couple of people I don't see too often - I wasn't necessarily looking forward to going tonight.

I was pleasantly surprised. Not only did I enjoy the keynote speaker, Michael Reagan (son of former president Ronald Reagan), much more than I had the speaker at the last one I went to (I won't name any names), but I found that different speakers at the banquet triggered different thoughts in me - lots of different thoughts about my life.

One of the speakers, Jennifer O'Neill, brought back thoughts of why I started volunteering at CPC in the first place. I am pro-life, and I do believe that life begins at conception and that it's not just a "glob of tissue" (especially in light of fact that there's a heartbeat at 3 weeks along - but that's another discussion). But there are other, more personal reasons that I'm not so fond of abortion.

Jennifer told her own story - about how she'd had an abortion and later on had ended up having 9 miscarriages. I thought of my own family... my older brother is adopted, with his birth mother being a young mom who could've easily chosen to abort her baby rather than carry him to term and then give him up. But she didn't. And I have a brother because of her choice, because of her strength and willingness to give him up to a couple that wasn't having any luck having children of their own.

Another of the speakers was a CPC client named Pam. Pam was 39 years old when she became pregnant, and was encouraged by several to have an abortion because her pregnancy was high-risk due to her age. This really hit home - my mom was 37 when she became pregnant with me. She'd had several miscarriages before me. What if my parents had just decided that they had one child, my brother, and didn't want to risk another miscarriage or even more problems with another pregnancy? What if they decided to just get an abortion instead of taking the risk of trying to carry another pregnancy to term at my mom's age? Hmm... let's not think about that.

Listening to the clients that spoke also made me think of my days as a volunteer counselor. You know, I know that some people think that the counselors are really just there to save babies and talk women into not having an abortion. While yes, the counselors are all pro-life and ultimately would like to see the women that come in have their babies instead of abort them, that is not all they care about or are there for. Most of the counselors that I've gotten to know really care about each woman that walks in the door of their center. And those counselors are there to love those women, befriend them, and educate them about their options. A lot of times that's exactly what the women that come into the centers need - especially the love.

I have a feeling that a lot of church people are under the impression that the women that are having abortions are women or young girls that are sexually active, not in church, and just want an easy out. Honestly - I don't see that as being the case at all. I think one of the statistics I heard tonight was that either 70 or 80% of the women that get abortions claim to be either Catholic or Protestant.

These women aren't getting abortions because it's an easy out. They're getting abortions because they think it will be easier to do that than to face those around them - the church. The church has put such an outcast license on "sinners" that no one wants to have to admit that they are one. Well, here's a news flash - WE ALL DO IT. More than likely, the people that women considering abortions are afraid to tell about their pregnancy, have done something just as "bad" or worse, even. It's sad that the church's reputation really should be one of love, yet a lot of the time we seek love in the form of authenticity more in those outside the church, because we know we won't be judged or looked down on.

CPC's a good organization. Maybe a bit too right-wing conservative for my taste, but I've seen it from the inside and know that deep down, there are some great intentions and some really great, genuine people involved in it. People that show the love and authenticity that these women that come in could stand to see a bit more of in their lives. Shouldn't we all be seeing (and maybe showing) a little more of that...

Citizens of a Diverse Country

Last week, twenty thousand people--all with strong opinions about illegal immigration--gathered downtown in Indy to voice those opinions. The result--the city's largest march and rally in a decade, jamming downtown streets.

What should happen to "illegal" immigrants? Should those born in Mexico or another country be allowed to just walk right into America and be allowed the same rights that those of us that were born here are provided? I guess I don't exactly think so. But I don't think we should tighten our borders or just "ship 'em out" either.

I'm not afraid of immigrants taking over our jobs. I'm not afraid of Spanish (or any other language for that matter) becoming a dominant language in the U.S. And I'm not afraid of whites becoming just another minority. But I do believe that it's fair to ask those from another country that want to reside in the U.S. and make a life here to follow a certain process.

What I don't think I agree with is that that process should be as hard as it is. From what I've heard, the process to become an American citizen is not all that much fun or easy. The only thing most of us did to become an American citizen was to be born. Why should we make it so hard for those that weren't quite as fortunate?

Here are my thoughts. Immigrants that come into the U.S. should be allowed to do just that - come in. No need for border strengthening - the U.S. is already a melting pot of diversity, and I think that's great. Every culture, every person, is valuable - why keep people out? But - if they really want to be a part of our country - live here, work here, etc - I think it's fair to ask that they go through the proper procedures. Or they don't get the same rights that we do, at least not by just walking in.

It's just to ask people to comply with the laws of our nation if they want to obtain the rights that the nation's citizens have. But there's no reason to be unfair and mean about it. What kind of nation would that really make us? Not one I'm so sure that I would be proud to be a citizen of, I'm afraid.

What's Really Important

Boy, Indiana is just making it into a lot of the top statistics lately. The latest one is pretty sad, though. This article declares our state the one with "the worst fatality rate for child abuse in the nation". What are we doing (or not doing might be more accurate) to earn a statistic like this one?

Well, first of all - in order to have the worst fatality rate for child abuse, that must mean we have a pretty bad rate for child abuse as well. Hmm... are there just a lot of really bad parents in Indiana, or what? I guess that's the first thing to think about. What kind of people harm their children like that? Stuff like this is apparently happening all around us, and we're not even aware. Or maybe those that are aware aren't doing enough about it.

People aren't islands. I know that parents can hide what's happening in their home, but why is it like this? Why do we let people become so sequestered (as well as retreating ourselves) that we wouldn't realize or notice that a child is being abused? Why isn't there more of a sense of community where familes at least integrated enough with other families that someone would at least have an idea that a child is being mistreated? And yes - it's a sticky situation. Who wants to be the one to report a parent when they find out they're abusing their child. And what if you're not sure? What then? I don't have all the answers, obviously - but I think it would at least be an improvement if our society wasn't so private.

What about those of us that don't always see or know when stuff like this is going on? What happens when we find out? There's got to be a way to stop this before an abuse turns into a fatality. Indiana at least seems to be trying to do something about it. As read in the above-mentioned article, "last year the Republican-controlled General Assembly, even in a tight budget cycle, approved hiring hundreds of additional caseworkers. A newly elected governor made it a priority to reorganize child welfare, creating a separate department with new leaders and a fresh approach to protecting abused kids." Sounds like we might at least be on the right track.

Stuff like this should be one of the more major issues when electing government officials. What are they going to do about this? We debate things like abortion (which is an important issue, I agree), but what about the children that we already have? Isn't taking care of them just as important? To me, this is just another indicator of how politics needs to change. We need to stop making it about left vs. right and make it more about taking care of what's important, like our children - before it's too late and those children aren't there to take care of anymore.